On Strengths and Weaknesses

Just this morning I had one of the biggest surprises of my life. I wanted to share but I’m afraid it’s way too personal. But just to give you an idea on how serious it is, I have used all the swear words that I saved up for 5 years. Haha. But kidding aside, it was a family matter that I never thought I will ever have to go through. I trusted the person so much, and now all the trust and respect that I have for him has gone down the drain :(

It is in trying times like this that I’m most thankful I have an awesome set of friends and an equally wonderful boyfriend backing me up. The entire time that I was feeling lonely and crying and confused, they were there to remind me to be rational and keep me grounded. They helped me to weigh things and think of the best course of action. With them I was able to set cowardice aside. Using all the guts left within me, I faced the issue. Being able to confront the person involved was a liberating experience. That person may have given me BS answers but at the very least, I was able to let him know that I am not letting it pass. I’ll be keeping an eye on him… for my family’s sake.

*silence*
 

Okay, ‘nuff of the sad thoughts now. Let me share with you my lesson for the day:
 

When depressed, stay away from the mall, 

especially the one with very tempting sale items.

Uh-huh, I bought not one, not two, not even three but 6 blouses at Landmark Trinoma. I’ve been weak, I know, but you can’t blame me! How could I say no to the array of colorful plus-sized clothes? I tried really hard to resist but I seem to have used up all my strength in this morning’s confrontation. And hey, you still have to congratulate me because I only spent a total of Php 1551.25! 6 office tops for less than 2k is a great deal, right? :D
 

So before I go and try those new shirts on, since it’s also National Heroes’ Day, allow me to thank my Jhay and my girlfriends for being my own set of heroes! Much love! :-*

Customizations Ongoing

I am kinda playing around with my layout at the moment so please bear with me.

Thanks a lot! :-)

Oh yeah, I have a new signature too! *dance*

Hot and Cold

Right now I am enduring a freakin' hot afternoon here at home because I wanted to make up for all the going-online-for-no-reason-at-all time that I lost this week. It was busy as hell at work (busier than last week's busy LOL) that I didn't even have time to fool around in Facebook. Imagine I had to work from 1PM to 3AM of the next day because of the deadline. I know this is usual for most carer-oriented people but I seem to be pretty much affected because it was the first time that I experienced it. (Note to self: Start getting used to working overtime.)

Oh well, let me go back to my thing today. A few minutes ago I enjoyed a cup of dirty ice cream! Hahaha. FYI, the entire neighborhood has been a suki of that one sorbetero for ages so I guess it's not dirty after all. :-)

How I loved the classic keso and tsokolate combination!

Who said that a Starbucks mug is only for a hot cup of coffee? It's perfect for a cold treat too! :-)

Peach was happy to know that this (however a different color)

was among my birthday wishes. Apple green is second only to pink
as my favorite color so it's still awesome! :)

Before I forget, I took a picture of the cute apple green mug just because I wanted to thank the person who gave it to me. She said she wanted me to remember her by leaving me something that I'll always use. So here's to my sweet girl, Peaches. Thanks for sharing a beautiful conversation with me. The date that we had yesterday was short but very very sincere and soothing. I'm looking forward to having another coffee break with you really soon. I'll miss you, girlfriend! Bon voyage!

A warm and time-tested friendship is one of life's simplest pleasures.

Oh yes, the barista mistook Peach for Mitch. Hahaha.

Mommy for a Day

Last Sunday was a real family day for the Rolle clan because it was my nephew Rafa’s 1st Birthday. Two party areas of Jollibee Alabang were occupied because all the relatives were there to join the fun.

The birthday boy and his family.

When I was a kid I adore Jollibee and guess what, some things never change. I still crave for Jolly Spaghetti every once in a while. I’m still enticed by Aga Muhlach holding the “crispylicious, juicylicious Chickenjoy.” And of course, I still take pictures with the endearing mascot of the country’s #1 fast food chain.

Jollibee and Me :-)

Yeah, I enjoyed the affair. I got to see the cousins who I seldom see, only this time all of us are young adults already. I took pleasure handing the kids the “Bring Me” item, proving time and again that I am every inch of a stage sister. I loved taking lots and lots of photographs: capturing family fun, immortalizing priceless Haley moments.

Mom brought with her a box of crayons to keep Haley busy.

She loves coloring and writing. Very good baby! :)

Haley dancing with her bags of chips. Mom brought those too! Haha.

Super cute! :D

 Slowly baby... You might end up as big as Ate Em. Hahaha.

The kids playing "The Longest Coin"... with a twist.

Haley loving her loot bag.

I and my Epic Friend. We're both pretty, I know! :)

Two of my best-loved godmothers.

Family shots! *Mom's the one in yellow, btw*

After more than two hours of being a kid again, I assumed another role. Because Alabang Town Center is just a few steps away, my aunts decided to stroll so I went with them… but Haley went with us too! It shouldn’t have been much of a deal had Mom come with us but she didn’t so I had to take care of the little girl. Thing is she doesn’t wanna walk because she’s scared of wearing shoes again! Last time they went to the mall she had new shoes on and she walked and ran around like there’s no tomorrow, and the result? She had 2 blisters per foot. Poor baby. And poor Ate Em because I had to carry her in my arms the whole time.

As if it wasn’t tiring to wander around ATC, we went to SM Southmall next. Haley fell asleep on the way so I had to cradle her from the car to the mall. I could feel it, I look haggard already but I am the day's Mommy, right?

That's me thinking how Mom (our real Mom) can take it when we go malling for hours, considering how small she is and how heavy Haley is. Hahaha.

After some wooing from her Ate Faye, Haley agreed to get on these super cute kiddie rides! They're battery-operated so kids can freely drive around the area. Indeed, Haley enjoyed it! :)

A dolphin, a panda and an... ant? Whatever! Haha.

These rides are at 10php for 3 minutes. So sulit!

After the fun rides, she walked already, but she still didn't put her shoes on. 

Look at how she enjoyed walking barefoot. 

She even posed with her Ates and Kuya.

Haley with two of her favorite cartoon characters.

 

Then we dropped by SM Storyland. We took a few pictures while it was the teenagers' turn to have fun.

 Faye, Choy and our cousin P-jhay in the mini Roller Coaster.

Do I really look like her Momma already???

At around 7pm it was time to go home. We had to commute going home since Tita A and her family's still driving to Cavite. Inside the bus, Haley's still energetic as ever!

 Pic #1: Making pa-cute with her cheeseburger

Pic #2: Her "no, you can't get this from me!" look

Pic #3: Headset's playing "Nobody" by Wondergirls.

Look at her hands, she's acting it out! :)

She was making kulit the entire trip until this 3-day sale poster caught her attention. Shopaholic in the making? Nah, she's actually singing A-B-C over and over while pointing out the letters. Adorable much noh? :)

We got home after an hour of travel. Yes, I was sooooo tired. In fact, my arms hurt until now. I experienced being a mommy and it's tough, but at the end of the day, seeing Haley happy makes all the effort worth it :-)

Super Proud Friend

That's what I am right now! :D

I mentioned in my previous post that one of my girlfriends had started blogging too. And now that her first official post is published, I just have to say that it's so worth the wait! Well, I could be bias because I was part of that blog but hey, try to read it so that you'll now that I'm not that partial after all. :P

I intend to write about my (tiring but happy) day tonight but because I wanted to rave about Jaq's blog, I'm saving that for tomorrow. Good night, world! And have a great work week ahead.. :-)

Don't forget to visit her, ha? :D

The Week That Was

I haven't written anything since Tuesday because it's so busy at work but tonight since I just ate (poor eating habit, I know), I need to be awake for a few more minutes so I'll make the most out of it by sharing the week's highlights.

Last weekend, I've been engrossed with downloading all Glee, The Music albums. I spent the first day of the work week e-mailing my girlfriends how amazing the singles are and volunteering to burn CDs for them. Thus, we had the perfect excuse for a Tuesday get-together: handing them their copies ^_^

We had dinner at Chowking Alphaland Mall (that's in Magallanes MRT Station) and I have to say I didn't enjoy my food :( I ordered the Orange Chicken Lauriat and I got 4 tiny pieces of chicken. The pansit canton was very disappointing too because it tasted like garlic. Good thing there was Chicharap, it helped me finish my meal.

Funny how our seating arrangement didn't change (see previous pic)

We stayed there until around 9:30 and was forced to leave because the crew were already turning off the lights and the aircon. But since we aren't even halfway done with our chikahan session, we've decided to stay at a nearby Starbucks, in Waltermart Makati that is. We had our beloved frappuccinos and some slices of pastry (c/o Jaq) and indulged in 3 solid hours of girl talk. Like tomorrow is a weekend, around 12:30AM we called it a night. Oh, an awesome night! :)

The next day, August 18th, was as great. I got in the office at 7:30 and was greeted by a personal message via Facebook from Toblerone Pilipinas. Yes, we won in the Toblerone Epic Friend Promo! Hurray! The awarding of Toblerone gift packs and The Spa GCs will be on September 4th. I and Ate Pants are so looking forward to it already :)

By lunch time I sneaked out to go to Robinson's Ermita to get a gift for my dear Tita Antin on her 51st birthday. I got back at 2pm, ate a quick lunch and an hour and a half later, my friends at work were already asking me to go have snacks. Gosh, my tummy is still so full but I went with them to Jollibee anyway. That time, Jhay was texting me saying sorry because he can't come to Tita's surprise birthday bash at home. Of course it got me down-hearted because we haven't seen each other for 2 long weeks but when we got inside Jollibee, Jhay was already there waiting for me! ^_^ I used to tease him because I always get his surprises busted but this time he was super successful! He and my friends were laughing at how shocked I was to see him there. Congrats honey!

We got home at around 6pm and they're all waiting for us because we have the cakes! And the celebration can't start without it! LOL. Everyone enjoyed the small salo-salo and Tita Antin enjoyed her day. Before bedtime I heard her crying while thanking Nanay Letty. Great job for me, my other two titas and Nanay, we were the people behind it! :)

My co-masterminds Tita Net (in fuchsia) and Tita A (in pink) with the birthday celebrant.

 
And just this morning, well yesterday technically, we got some good news from the company's top management. I want to remain hushed about it, but to give you an idea, it's coming this 25th. My oh my, what a great way to end a busy week! :)

What's a week full of kwento without pictures? I'll be adding them as soon as I get my camera back. (Update: 8/21, 7pm - Pictures added! :D) I lent it to a friend by the name of Jaquiline Badeo. And what's with the mention of her full name? It's because I wanted you to help me in welcoming her to the wonderful world of blogging! Visit her here, now na!

It's 1:35am in my clock and I think my midnight snack is down there already. Haha. Be back blogging when I wake up. Have a great weekend everyone! :D

Sharing: And now, a young man responds

I was busy pretending that I'm busy (if you know what I mean :P) when an officemate popped me a link via Meebo. And to my surprise, it was a response to the letter that I reposted here a few days back. With much gusto, I clicked the link. I found myself setting aside my headset playing my much-loved Glee Music as I began to read the article. Halfway through it, I was teary eyed. And soon after I finished the letter, my reaction was a deep, and may I add heartfelt, sigh. Tell me, with the mood that it gives and the feeling of affection that lingers, how in the world can I start working?

Yes, please, see for yourself ^_^

And now, a young man responds

By Cathy Babao-Guballa

Philippine Daily Inquirer

First Posted 22:05:00 08/15/2010

OVERWHELMED, AWED AND humbled.

Those three words best describe the feelings my daughter and I have had last week as we received letters and comments on last week’s column that contained her letter to the man she will love someday.

Apparently, the letter struck a chord among the young and old.

One letter stood out—from an equally hopeful young man. I told my daughter the whole experience was starting to feel like a scene from “Letters to Juliet” and my eternally romantic 45-year-old heart just felt really blessed to be in the middle of it all.

I will let my daughter express our gratitude in her response below. We have been blessed in more ways than you will ever know. May you all find God’s best in His time.

My daughter’s letter

Dear readers,

I never expected that so many of you would find yourselves in a simple letter I wrote one night when I was most vulnerable, where in retrospect I realize now were just echoes of the little dreams my heart carried.

While I study to become a doctor someday, I know my focus should be on the literal intricacies of the human heart as opposed to what it feels. However, I find nothing wrong in hoping to meet that someone who’ll make it skip a beat.

To hope for love isn’t a bad thing, as long as you continue to live your life to the full while waiting for God’s best. As one wise reader wrote—it could be that “God is still preparing you both for that right moment.”

Meanwhile, we can learn, experience, and become happy with the things we do have in our lives today before that time comes, because after all, happiness never does depend on a single person.

Thank you to everyone who shared their stories of waiting and finding true love and to all the young people who appreciate the concept of not settling for just anyone but waiting for that someone. It is nice to know that there are others out there who still hope and pray for the right kind of love.

Two nights after the letter was published, I received this in my personal mail—an anonymous response to my letter. I want to share it with you all—a letter written by a man any girl would love to fall in love with someday.

Dear You,

I will admit that it came as a surprise to me when you decided to write a letter such as this. I always thought you were the type to keep things to yourself—one of the many things that keep us apart until now.

There is a part of every boy’s heart that dreams of his princess. However, no matter what the age, this princess does not change.

Nineteen years into this life, and although your unwillingness to give your heart away is what troubles you, what troubles me is how willing I am each and every time to give my complete heart and yet there is no one to receive anything of me.

Try as I might to give my heart to someone I had imagined was perfect, and I end up putting the pieces back together, mustering the courage to make it seems like nothing is wrong and nothing has been lost, when in fact, everything in my life at that point feels otherwise.

Although I have only known you for a few years, I am as confident as a man in love can be, that you are the perfect girl I have been thinking of ever since. Nineteen years into this life, and we are both still apparently waiting… for someone to be swept off her feet, and for someone to sweep you off yours. And yet, here we are closer to each other than you would expect.

I am sorry I took this long. But, I hope you know, it has not been entirely easy, trying to whisk you off to my palace on horseback. I am not alone in this pursuit of your love and I have no palace to show you in comparison to the many other men who will try to win your heart. You have not been entirely cooperative as well, but I do not blame you for this. In fact, it’s just one of the many quirks that sets you apart from other girls out there.

You will be disappointed to know that it has not been such a fairytale - meeting me, and for this I will be eternally sorry. I hope you know guys spend more than enough time trying to come up with the perfect introduction, what with sweaty palms and a shaky voice. As to the extreme disappointment I may cause you, I also hope you know that you are still as perfect in my eyes as always. I may not have begun it as a fairytale for us, but I will go through leaps and bounds to make you feel like the princess that you are.

Your eccentricities are what I love about you. Even during your occasional mood swings, it is the most endearing thing to see you shift gears. Although I must admit, sometimes it can be quite confusing; keeping me on my toes, it just makes me want to be with you even more. I want to be the man you stand beside at your best and your worst—because either way, you are still too beautiful, and I would be nothing less than the luckiest guy in town if you were just as happy as I was, standing beside you.

You are and will always be my best friend, even if one day I end up finding no more shirts because you have borrowed them all. And when you return them I end up not wearing them, still, because the scent is there to remind me of you even when you are not around. You are my best friend because you look out for me, after a stressful day, or after we lose a game of basketball. Even during times when you refuse to speak to anyone, me included—you are still my best friend.

You will be the girl I try so hard to cook for, and despite my best efforts I know I will fail, but I will love how you will try to taste my concoctions, even when the taste might make you cringe. You will be the girl whose mom I will try so hard to impress, and then you will fix my collar in hopes that I am ready to meet your parents. Adventure after adventure, you will be the girl I will see the world with, complete with the local cuisine taste and souvenir shots.

You are the girl I will smile to even in the worst of times. Even when the day feels like s__t, I know that when I see you that my world cannot be so bad if you are beside me. You are the girl whose smile I will wake up to, even when some mornings might find me with a slight case of morning breath. I cannot wait to love you.

Fingers crossed and palms held together, I hope one day you will find me worthy of your heart. In the meantime, know that I am out here somewhere, waiting for you, hoping that you will be mine.

Loving you forever and a day,

Me

I was completely overwhelmed by this and went to sleep that night with a smile on my face, knowing that there are many people out there who continue to hold steadfastly to the hope of finding not the perfect, but the right person for them. So to every heart out there that continues to hope to someday know what that feels like- here’s to allowing God to write our love stories.

With much love and gratitude,

Pia

My Biggest Loser Audition Experience

August 13th was the last leg of the nationwide auditions for Biggest Loser Pinoy Edition and as promised, I'll be sharing my very own experience. I was cut after the first round of eliminations but I'll tell my tale anyway :-)

Let's face it. It's really really difficult to lose weight. Aside from the fact that I have a big appetite, it's actually expensive to do a real diet. Why? Because first, you have to carefully choose the food that you eat. You can't eat just what is available or served at the table because they could be fatty or full of calories or whatsoever. Even staying away from softdrinks is really costy because most fast food outlets charge extra for a juice or iced tea upgrade. You see, in one way or another, you need extra moolah to shed some pounds. And having a lot of financial responsibilities equates to not having an "allot for dieting" item in my monthly budget.

That being said, I was instantly smitten by the idea of joining the Biggest Loser Pinoy Edition. Even if it'll mean showing the whole archipelago your sweaty moments and all the drama that comes with losing weight, you win in the end. You gain self-confidence, you get a slimmer body, you adapt a healthy lifestyle. After thinking about it from Monday to Thursday of that week, I've decided: I'M GOING TO THE AUDITIONS.

July 9 was the big day. I woke up at around 4:30AM because I wanted to be there early. I didn't tell anyone at home that I am going to the auditions because I don't want them to know just yet. They bought my "We have to attend a conference call with the US-based client" excuse for leaving the house early. I got to the venue, the PBB Activity Area, at exactly 6AM and much to my surprise, there were only a few people in line. If I remember it right, I was only #61 on the registration sheet. Could be because overweight people in the country are still hesitant to admit it, I thought.

I went there all by myself but I was lucky that the two girls next to me were friendly enough to introduce themselves. Ana and Tin are college students and actually thought that I still am, too! Well yeah, I'm flattered. ^_^ We enjoyed talking about a lot of things so we didn't quite notice that we've been standing for more than three hours already. At a little past 9AM, with the number of auditioners tripled, the gates were opened. And as I took a deep breath, I told myself "This is it, Em." 

Me, Ana, Tin. I like Ana, she's such a sweet girl. I wish I could reconnect with her

via Facebook but my gosh, there are a lot of ANA SYs in the world! Haha.

The first step is, of course, the weigh in. One of the qualifications is that males should be at least 250 lbs and females 200 lbs. The last time I stepped on a scale, it read 210 so I was a bit worried and thinking if I've been eating enough to maintain it. LOL. And when it's finally my turn, the digits have spoken: 207.5 lbs! Geez, I almost didn't make it to the requirement! Most of the girls weigh 250 pounds on average and there are really big guys weighing 300-400 lbs. For the first time in my entire life I felt slim and sexy! Hahaha.

Upon stepping off the scale, we were given the application form and waiver along with our official number, and I am 0092. We sat inside the activity area while filling out the 5-page form. It took me quite some time to accomplish it because it included a questionnaire with items like (1) What's your secret dream? (2) What are the things that are hard to do when you're fat? (3) What are the first 5 things you will do after you lose weight? I really spent a lot of time answering the first one, and my answer? Secret nga eh :P

Inside this door the 1st screening transpired.

 Us while waiting for our turn.

Sets of 10 were led to another building for the first elimination while the rest waited. Some were asked to dance, some to shoot VTRs to be used as teasers and me? I just stayed in my seat praying that I don't get to be chosen to do those, too. A little shy of 12NN, my batch was asked to proceed to the 1st screening area which is just a few steps away. When we got inside, that's when I started to feel the chills. Inside the closed door is a panel of judges making the first cut. In a few minutes we were asked to enter the room. One of the panelists greeted the 10 of us and said,

"Introduce yourselves. State your name, your age, your weight, what you do at the moment and why you think you became that big."

And because I am kinda nervous and in interviews I'm not used to saying more than what was asked, I gave a plain and simple response, but I made sure I answered all the questions:

"I am Maude Maxine Rolle, 22, 207.5 pounds, I do Software Quality Assurance for an IT company based in Makati. I think I am this big because I really eat a lot. And malakas talaga ako sa rice."

Then I was surprised because the succeeding ones gave very lengthy answers, one of them even cried. I was like, oh well, drama makes for a perfect audition piece. I thought I just narrowed my chances of getting in because of being a plain Jane. After the last one, the panelist said

"Okay, thank you very much for your time. And please wait outside for the results."

What the... That was it??? As we exited that small room I felt certain that I won't make it to the next round. Maybe it was part of the challenge but I just didn't expect that we'll be given one question and it's over. Needless to say, I was sent home. Ana was among the qualifiers and I was genuinely happy for her because she's a nice girl. And the girl who shed tears? Of course she's in too! I told you, it was part of her plan. LOL.

I bid the girls goodbye and went on my way home. At the FX, I was still in deep thoughts. Of course a part of me felt sad that I didn't give it my all but a bigger part of me was proud because I took my chance. Even if I didn't make it, at least I've given it a try. That's still better than not going and wondering what could have been for the rest of my life. And if there's one lesson that I have learned from my Biggest Loser Experience, that is to always always do things as if you only have one shot to wow the world :-)

How's that for a souvenir shot? :)

Friday the 13th Fun

I've always been neutral about the Friday the 13th jinx that people talk about. I never had a bad experience about that day, or at least not that I can remember. But last night made me lean towards liking the dreaded Friday because after 9 long years, I got to bond with my elementary bestfriend again! :-)

The last time I saw Peaches was on Junie's baptism because she was one of my little sister's godmothers. Oh, fyi, she and her family migrated to Texas some 6 years ago. So the very first time she told me over Facebook that she'll be coming home to the Philippines for a vacation, I was really excited. I'm not really sure how we would jive because we haven't been hanging out for long but hell, I am really looking forward to it! It's like I'm even more excited than Junie, who's actually the one to receive a lot of stuff because her Ninang Peach has a lot of utang already!

And so after a few exchange of messages, we agreed to meet-up yesterday. We really don't have a lot of plans for the night. All we know is that there'll be a lot of catching up. And indeed, we didn't do anything else! We had dinner at Kenny Rogers and seated there for like two and a half hours talking about our adventures and misadventures in MCS. Oh by the way, another friend of mine, Peaches' schoolbus mate Lester also joined the fun! We had a really good laugh while reminiscing our kalokohans.

I forgot to mention that Junie was with us too because Peaches wants to make up for all the birthdays and Christmases that she missed. She got a Barbie doll which Peaches brought pa from the US then she made lambing to her ninang to buy her some kikay stuff at this really chic shop called Girls. Nevertheless, the little girl enjoyed the night as much as we did.

 

Peaches, thanks for spending with us a portion of your elusive vacay time, and for the treats too (especially the chocolates.. LOL)! You haven't left yet but I miss you already. Have a safe trip going back! And please, come home to PI again... soon! :-)